Fake it til you make it? I don't think so...

 

#RitaHutchesonCobbs 2009 to 2017 and minus over 300lbs

I have heard a lot of different quotes to inspire and encourage one's self through various situations of crises to reaching their life goals. However, one I try to forget, but then find myself quoting is, "Fake it until you make it." Why? I will be honest as to why, here, now, upfront. I spent too many years, faking and masking the realities of life for too long. I realize there are times and places to express the truth and exhibit it on your face and with body expressions, but then there are times to not share everything you are feeling. Also, there are people in your life that you need to boldly and with confidence share your concerns, burdens, joys and struggles with and others you should not. God built our community of people in our lives this way on purpose. I just learned this a few years ago.

I was taught by family that because I was a minister's wife, I was to hold things in, hide problems, mask situations and smile all the time. It wasn't hard for me because part of me lived happy anyway. However, as one friend described me about three-years ago, "You were wound up like a top and it was as if someone had you on strings as a puppet." Do you feel as if you are wound too tight? What about feelings of puppet strings, leaving you out of control of your own performance?

Living a healthy lifestyle, may mean removing a mask or taking the smile off in a safe place with people that are truly trust worthy with how you feel or what you are going through. Feelings are just that, feelings. You can't trust them, but they don't always have to be fixed. You just need someone to listen, not justify, condemn or advise you or the feelings you have. I didn't know my own feelings because I was trying to fight back with words, to stand up for myself, when you shouldn't have to stand up for yourself in relationships of friendships, marriage or family at all. There should be no masking at anytime. 

The thing that can make a difference and even though it may seem fake or masking is smiling. When all else seems bad and when you don't really feel like doing it, smile. The one thing that takes less muscle power and leaves you with fewer wrinkles is smiling. For some reason, smiling lifts your spirits and encourages you from within as you go through your morning and your day. It changes your mood while you are alone because you have nobody to impress but yourself and God. Then as you pass a mirror, you notice how much better you look. When you pass someone, they may smile back. We have no idea how a smile toward someone can change their day. People have written how a smile saved their lives! 

Save your mask for parties or holidays to wear as an accessory. Let's put them away, take a deep breath, cleanse within and let it all out. Wash our face, pat it dry and smile at the person we see in the mirror. There is a God living with in if you believe and He needs us to be real and exhibit the gospel of His Son and demonstrate the reality of the Holy Spirit and it could begin with a smile, then add the words. 

Today, that same friend that said my life was controlled by a top and a puppeteer, says that she likes me better today. I am living true, but free. My life is still demonstrating joy and happiness, but I am not as wound up as in my past. I am living out of the bondage of masking. Breaking the chains takes time, but the freedom in the healing is so worth it. Live a healthy lifestyle with no excuses in the freedom of spirit, soul and body. Smile. 

Hugs, Rita